Why Do People Choose a Funeral Home?
Like many people, I set “Google Alerts” for key topics I follow about end-of-life. Recently, my alerts are unusually concentrated with media reports that revolve around cremation. The latest media hype, was over a funeral home having unclaimed cremated remains. What this means, is that the deceased’s family, for whatever reasons never picked up their loved one’s cremated remains from the funeral home or crematory. This may sound strange to the general public, however, it really isn’t new worthy. For all funeral homes and crematories across the country, it’s a common occurrence. Other alerts include wedding planners adding funeral celebrations to their repertoire, and entrepreneurs who have a new concept to send their loved one off in style. One company was trying to raise money to build a rocket that will fly your loved one’s cremated remains to the moon. After reading these alerts, I have become curious about the reasons behind the “why” people choose a funeral home.
The next few paragraphs will share observations, random thoughts, and questions about this topic. As you read this, please take a moment to reflect and share your thoughts at the end.
Familiarity?
History shows, a major reason is because that’s where their family always went. Today, this doesn’t prove to be true. Location, can also be a factor. To some degree, this still holds true. However, funeral homes, much like hospitals, are a destination, typically not a place of convenience.
Is price the determining factor?

If price is strictly the case, many funeral homes have a “free” cremation option. It’s an organ and body part donation option, that is followed by cremation. This is a newer concept and is offered though a company called MEDCURE, who partners with funeral homes. MEDCURE is a for profit organ donation business, that will compensate the funeral home for their professional services and the necessary legalities. The deceased’s family will receive their loved one’s cremated remains within twelve weeks after death, along with one death certificate. This option, is not too good to be true – its very real. MEDCURE is a reputable company that provides a no cost cremation solution for families. Keep in mind that MEDCURE does have the right to decline a body based on it’s condition. There are two reasonable caveats that must be met which revolves around the condition of the deceased. You can learn more about this on their website.
Do people perceive funeral homes as a rip off?
Probably to some degree. It only takes one disreputable funeral professional to place a stigma for everyone who operates an honest business. All professions have their “black sheep”. However, because there is reverence that comes with the care of the dead, one unethical behavior, becomes over sensationalized and then the poster child for all death care professionals.
Just a side note. The death care profession is highly regulated. Funeral homes, directors and their staff must uphold to numerous standards. All of which are set by the Federal Trade Commission, Occupational Safety & Heath Administration, Music Licensing and Regulation, Insurance and Trust institutions that regulate pre-funded funerals, not to mention all the necessary insurance liability requirements.
Does religion or race play a role?
Many ethnic communities remain segregated by choice. For example, 98% of all African Americans patronage a funeral home that is owned and operated by African Americans. As a country, we should be past this. How do we overcome this norm?
Religion – one could argue either side of that decision. Statistics show, that there is a decrease of persons who attend organized religion. Why? The baby boomer generation have a large segment that is “un-churched”. Please don’t confuse un-churched with “un-religious”. A large sector of boomers will outwardly say they are spiritual. Others will say they have their own personal relationship with God, and don’t feel the need to congregate with others. There are also others who have prayer groups at their home, rather than attending a church.
Does the deceased control the funeral home choice?
Most families will honor their loved one’s request by using the funeral home their loved one requested. If the deceased pre-arranged or prefunded their funeral, 99% of the time, the survivors honor that decision.
As an end of life expert, understanding the wants and needs of today’s consumer, is how I help death care professionals better serve their community. In today’s world, funeral norms are becoming a thing of the past. My observation is that people don’t know what they want, but they do know what they don’t want! In closing, what are your thoughts on this subject. The only way the end of life and death care profession we can learn, is to ask and then listen! Your insight is valuable.
“I really enjoy the post.Thanks Again. Much obliged.”
I agree that you want to consider if you are familiar with a funeral home. It would be good to find somewhere that you can trust the director. My mom is looking for a funeral home, so she’ll have to consider how kind they are.
I agree that you need to consider the price when choosing a funeral home. It would be good to consider this because it would show their qualifications. I’m looking for a funeral home, so I’ll have to check the price.
It’s fascinating that some families leave their loved one’s remains at funeral homes. I was even more surprised that it was a common occurrence. I think part of the reason someone may leave their loved ones remains at a funeral home is because they may not want to say goodbye, and claiming the remains would make that realization more potent.
It’s good to know that the deceased’s pre-arranged funearl plans are almost always honored. I’ve been thinking of pre-planning my funeral to help saved my loved ones any stress when I pass. Knowing that my wishes will be met definitely helps me feel more confident about having my funeral pre-planned.
I’m sure religion plays a big role in the type of funeral home you choose, like you said. You do want a funeral home that will accommodate your spiritual needs when holding a funeral. It’s good to know that there are a large majority of people who are not affiliated with a religion, so religion probably doesn’t matter when it comes to choosing a funeral home.
I am so thankful for what you have shared about the funeral home. This might be not that good to talk about, however, everybody would end up like this. So it’s just a matter of acceptance and having the courage to face the reality. As far as I know, familiarity almost always takes place as a deciding factor on the part of the family.
My aunt was not feeling well for months now and she just learned that she has a terminal disease, so, he wants to settle her funeral. It was explained here that people choose funeral homes because people are more familiar with it. Furthermore, it’s recommended to talk to professionals when considering funeral services.
I love what you said about funeral homes being destinations and not just places of convenience when it comes to location. Working with a funeral home that implements a special veterans package is a great way to honor your deceased loved one. If I were to plan a veteran’s funeral, I would do some research to find the best home to work with.
I was talking to a friend of mine that has been helping a loved one plan her funeral. She wants to make sure that she is planning this correctly. It might help her to ask her loved one if he is interested in making a religion part of the services.
A good question to ask is if religion or race does place a role or not. For me, religion does play a role in my funeral. That is something that I would want my kids to understand fully.
My sister placed in her will to be cremated in case something happens to her. It was mentioned here that some funeral homes have a free cremation option and this will allow our family to save money. Furthermore, it’s recommended to go to trusted funeral homes when considering a cremation service.
I like how you mentioned that price is one of the determining factors as to why families would determine on whether or not to choose a funeral home for when they die since allowing a service to be held in your wake allows friends and family to get together and relive your best memories. At the same time, it allows for the family’s religion to take apart during the funeral preparations since integrating pieces of culture and tradition into the ceremony should be just as memorable with my dad’s. If I were given the chance to plan a funeral service it would be with the best traditions of both cultures that the person know about.